THE BEST OF WHOSE LINE IS IT ANYWAY? UNCENSORED
Starring:
-Drew Carey
-Ryan Stiles
-Colin Mochrie
-Wayne Brady
If you aren’t familiar with this, or other improv shows, then where the heck do you live? Under a rock? This one just happens to be the cream of the crop, the absolute best of the best. Drew sits safely behind his neon-trimmed desk and calls out suggestions to the three regular performers and one random guest performer. There are occasionally special guest stars (Florence Henderson, Richard Simmons, Jerry Springer, David Hasselhoff, and Jane Tricker, female bodybuilder), but these are few and far between. However, the special guest star episodes have a definite theme relating to the person running through the skits.
They rotate the games constantly, so they won’t necessarily play your favorite one every night, but you’re guaranteed to never get bored.
This cast works so well together it’s positively magical. There’s a lot of trust there, combined with quick wit, comedic flexibility, and just a little bit of insanity.
Until the entire series is made available to own (*fingers crossed* please include awesome bonus features, please include awesome bonus features!) this 2-disc collection will have to do.
But, if you have to settle for something, this set ain’t bad. In fact, every episode will make you laugh until you hurt. I actually had to pause several times because I either couldn’t take it any more, or I needed a chance to calm down again because I was missing more of the skit.
I pity people who can’t enjoy ‘Whose Line,’ I really do.
So don’t be pitied. And for goodness sakes, fluff your Garfield.
…if you know what I mean.
FINAL GRADE: A+
Off in search of things you’ll never hear people say at a funeral,
M.
Thursday, April 15, 2010
Day 102- Alice Cooper Live at Montreux 2005
ALICE COOPER LIVE AT MONTREUX
Although it is a bit strange to see sixty-something year old Alice singing “Department of Youth”, I can forgive him cause he’s so freaking cool.
It’s also strange to see him strutting around stage in his black leather with his flowing locks and think, “Okay, this is my brother in Christ.” But not strange bad, strange AWESOME.
Sadly, some of the songs are almost too hard to watch, because whatever idiot cut all the camera angles together thought we needed to be seeing twelve different shots per second. And with the lights going and the audio blaring, this is a bit much, even for the most experienced head-banger. It just makes it too hard to concentrate on Alice and quite frankly, that’s who I’m here to see. I care nothing about the twenty-three year old doofus who somehow managed to score this sweet gig. If he was Jimi Hendrix I’d be all, “Hey, let me watch him play!” But he’s just a punk kid taking valuable screen time away from my main man Alice.
Brothers and sisters, I submit to you that this is unforgiveable.
In short, this is quite a concert. It has a lot of my favorites, but not quite all of them. Still, I wouldn’t have been disappointed had I been in the audience that night. All the flashy theatrical stuff is there in heaping helpings, and Alice is just as bizarre as ever.
Random thought: I wish I had an Alice Cooper action figure. How cool would that be? I’d put him in my dollhouse with all my old Fisher Price families. Gah, wouldn’t that just freak them right out? Weebles wobble but they don’t fall down and Alice will rock your face off.
FINAL GRADE: A-
Off in search of a girl with a job and a car and a house and cable,
M.
Although it is a bit strange to see sixty-something year old Alice singing “Department of Youth”, I can forgive him cause he’s so freaking cool.
It’s also strange to see him strutting around stage in his black leather with his flowing locks and think, “Okay, this is my brother in Christ.” But not strange bad, strange AWESOME.
Sadly, some of the songs are almost too hard to watch, because whatever idiot cut all the camera angles together thought we needed to be seeing twelve different shots per second. And with the lights going and the audio blaring, this is a bit much, even for the most experienced head-banger. It just makes it too hard to concentrate on Alice and quite frankly, that’s who I’m here to see. I care nothing about the twenty-three year old doofus who somehow managed to score this sweet gig. If he was Jimi Hendrix I’d be all, “Hey, let me watch him play!” But he’s just a punk kid taking valuable screen time away from my main man Alice.
Brothers and sisters, I submit to you that this is unforgiveable.
In short, this is quite a concert. It has a lot of my favorites, but not quite all of them. Still, I wouldn’t have been disappointed had I been in the audience that night. All the flashy theatrical stuff is there in heaping helpings, and Alice is just as bizarre as ever.
Random thought: I wish I had an Alice Cooper action figure. How cool would that be? I’d put him in my dollhouse with all my old Fisher Price families. Gah, wouldn’t that just freak them right out? Weebles wobble but they don’t fall down and Alice will rock your face off.
FINAL GRADE: A-
Off in search of a girl with a job and a car and a house and cable,
M.
Day 101 - 101 Dalmatians
Here's the story of a lovely lady, who was bringing up a very lovely dog. They were two bitches (tee hee) living all together, but they were all alone.
Till the one day when the lady met this fellow, and he also had a big black spotted pup....
Okay, I don't know how to end it. Painted myself into a corner with that one, didn't I?
Anyway, this is the story of Pongo and Perdita and their fifteen puppies, all of whom are abducted by the villainous Cruella de Vil. Cruella plans on using their hides for the world's most diabolical fashion statement.
Her minions kidnap the wee pups and take them to a big, drafty, mansion in the middle of nowhere.
Pong and Perdy ask for help from their other animal friends, who travel pass the word along that the puppies are missing.
But there a lot more than 15 puppies who need saving. Still, you know the old adage, a puppy's a puppy, no matter how small. So Pongo and Perdy have all of them follow them home and away from Cruella's evil, bony clutches.
Here's where the story gets a little out of town. Rodger's all, "Let's keep them all!" And Anita's all, "Oh, RODG-ah!" and they keep all 101 Dalmatians.
This is one of those Classic Disney movies that you need to be able to watch for days on end should you ever decide to procreate. I remember my biggest 101 Dalmatians phase lasted about seven months, at which time I referred to my mother only as "Cruella" and became obsessed with collecting and naming stuffed dogs. I wasn't racist about it, though; I took more than dalmatians.
Till the one day when the lady met this fellow, and he also had a big black spotted pup....
Okay, I don't know how to end it. Painted myself into a corner with that one, didn't I?
Anyway, this is the story of Pongo and Perdita and their fifteen puppies, all of whom are abducted by the villainous Cruella de Vil. Cruella plans on using their hides for the world's most diabolical fashion statement.
Her minions kidnap the wee pups and take them to a big, drafty, mansion in the middle of nowhere.
Pong and Perdy ask for help from their other animal friends, who travel pass the word along that the puppies are missing.
But there a lot more than 15 puppies who need saving. Still, you know the old adage, a puppy's a puppy, no matter how small. So Pongo and Perdy have all of them follow them home and away from Cruella's evil, bony clutches.
Here's where the story gets a little out of town. Rodger's all, "Let's keep them all!" And Anita's all, "Oh, RODG-ah!" and they keep all 101 Dalmatians.
This is one of those Classic Disney movies that you need to be able to watch for days on end should you ever decide to procreate. I remember my biggest 101 Dalmatians phase lasted about seven months, at which time I referred to my mother only as "Cruella" and became obsessed with collecting and naming stuffed dogs. I wasn't racist about it, though; I took more than dalmatians.
Day 100 - Muppet Treasure Island
MUPPET TREASURE ISLAND
Starring:
-Tim Curry
-The Muppets
-Billy Connolly
Directed by: Brian Henson
Screenplay Credits: Jerry Juhl, Kirk R. Thatcher & James V. Hart
MPAA Rating: G
I love this movie. I love it so much that I decided to review it for the fantastically wonderful DAY 100 of the 2010 Movie Project. High voiced little pipsqueak Kevin Bishop stars as Jim, the youngster who inherits an old treasure map. Along with the map, Jim receives a warning: beware the one legged man.
Cue the girly, almost entirely annoying expositional song where Jim dreams of “something better.”
After the inn where he lives is raided by pirates, Jim and his friends Rizzo the Rat and Gonzo the Whatever decide to hire a crew and go after the treasure and a life of adventure on the high seas. They meet the dimwit son of a prominent shipbuilder (Fozzie Bear), who agrees to finance the voyage and leaves the hiring of the crew up to the Man Who Lives in His Finger, Mr. Bimble.
Mr. Bimble the Finger Dweller hires a pretty ragged looking bunch of “cutthroats and scallywags” but he does get it right by hiring Captain James Smollett (aka Kermit the Frog) to lead the voyage. Since Jim is a foolish, trusting child, he doesn’t realize that amiable galley cook Long John Silver (who just happens to have only one leg thanks to movie magic) is actually a bloodthirsty pirate who’s hell-bent on getting his greedy paws on that thar’ treasure map, me hardy! Yar!
Yes, I said ‘yar.’ Get over it.
Throw in a handful of catchy songs and some positively inspired dialogue and you have yourself one of the finest Muppet movies ever made. EVER. So if you’re ever in the mood to go sailing for adventure on the big, blue, wet thing, be sure to take the Muppets along. I guarantee they’ll make your voyage much more interesting, and who knows… they might just rescue you from a one-legged sweet transvestite.
FINAL GRADE: A++++
Off in search of Jimmy Jim, Jimmy Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim,
M.
P.S. I’M not Jimmy Jim, Jimmy Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim! HE’S Jimmy Jim, Jimmy Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim.
Starring:
-Tim Curry
-The Muppets
-Billy Connolly
Directed by: Brian Henson
Screenplay Credits: Jerry Juhl, Kirk R. Thatcher & James V. Hart
MPAA Rating: G
I love this movie. I love it so much that I decided to review it for the fantastically wonderful DAY 100 of the 2010 Movie Project. High voiced little pipsqueak Kevin Bishop stars as Jim, the youngster who inherits an old treasure map. Along with the map, Jim receives a warning: beware the one legged man.
Cue the girly, almost entirely annoying expositional song where Jim dreams of “something better.”
After the inn where he lives is raided by pirates, Jim and his friends Rizzo the Rat and Gonzo the Whatever decide to hire a crew and go after the treasure and a life of adventure on the high seas. They meet the dimwit son of a prominent shipbuilder (Fozzie Bear), who agrees to finance the voyage and leaves the hiring of the crew up to the Man Who Lives in His Finger, Mr. Bimble.
Mr. Bimble the Finger Dweller hires a pretty ragged looking bunch of “cutthroats and scallywags” but he does get it right by hiring Captain James Smollett (aka Kermit the Frog) to lead the voyage. Since Jim is a foolish, trusting child, he doesn’t realize that amiable galley cook Long John Silver (who just happens to have only one leg thanks to movie magic) is actually a bloodthirsty pirate who’s hell-bent on getting his greedy paws on that thar’ treasure map, me hardy! Yar!
Yes, I said ‘yar.’ Get over it.
Throw in a handful of catchy songs and some positively inspired dialogue and you have yourself one of the finest Muppet movies ever made. EVER. So if you’re ever in the mood to go sailing for adventure on the big, blue, wet thing, be sure to take the Muppets along. I guarantee they’ll make your voyage much more interesting, and who knows… they might just rescue you from a one-legged sweet transvestite.
FINAL GRADE: A++++
Off in search of Jimmy Jim, Jimmy Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim,
M.
P.S. I’M not Jimmy Jim, Jimmy Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim! HE’S Jimmy Jim, Jimmy Jim, Jim, Jim, Jim.
Day Ninety-Nine: Survivor - The Australian Outback
THE AUSTRALIAN OUTBACK
Hosted by: Jeff Probst
Yes, I’m one of the losers who likes SURVIVOR so much they occasionally need to O.D. on it. And what better season to get all hopped up on than the infamous season 2? It is in the Australian outback that we first become acquainted with Colby, the handsome young cowboy with the Texas drawl; Jerri Manthey, the bitch queen from hell; Maralyn “Mad Dog” Hershey, the retired cop who does her own sound FX; Kel, the U.S. Army Captain made famous by a piece of imaginary beef jerky; Elisabeth Filarski, the cutie patootie with the stupid name who cried every day, became BFFS with Kentucky Joe, and landed herself a sweet gig as a talk show host; not to mention Keith, the gourmet chef who “can’t cook rice”, Kimmi, the obnoxious wannabe vegetarian, Nick, the lazy grad student, and Michael “pig killer” Skupin.
This extraordinary cast of characters (there were random others like Jeff Varner and Deb Eaton, but you can’t possibly expect me to drone on about all 16 of them, geez) is the major reason why this season was so great. They played off one another like actors in a sitcom, making one memorable episode after another. The other element that makes this season a particularly memorable one is the outback itself. We’re talking crazy lightening, flash floods sweeping the camp (and food) away, horrible beasties, and withering heat. Australia’s no wuss, people.
The game was still relatively young back in 2000, and either there wasn’t much scheming going on back then or the editors just chose not to show it. As I recall, you don’t see all the scrambling before each tribal council that you see now. People here just seem to go quietly into that dark night, whereas in more current Survivor seasons they fight to the death (unless they’re being royally screwed by a big blindside) to keep their torch lit.
There also seems to be a lot more interaction going on between cute little Jeff Probst and the castaways. He comes down to their beach sometimes, heck, he even shares in their rewards occasionally. If he still does that in season 20 or whatever we’re in, they sure don’t show it much.
And another thing… Ole Jeff’s got a pretty sweet gig. He gets to fly all over the world, visiting beautiful and exotic locales, sampling local cuisine, probably staying in fancy hotels, enjoying the finest hookers that money can buy, and every couple of days he pops out to the wilderness to make snarky remarks and boss around a bunch of dirty, hungry people.
Who among us wouldn’t want that job?
Knoxville mom of two and personal nurse Tina Wesson for the win (and in my book, she deserves it! She was the nicest person there and she single-handedly saved their replacement rice from the dangerous rapids. She is woman, hear her roar).
FINAL GRADE: A
Off in search of a nifty bandana of my own,
M.
Hosted by: Jeff Probst
Yes, I’m one of the losers who likes SURVIVOR so much they occasionally need to O.D. on it. And what better season to get all hopped up on than the infamous season 2? It is in the Australian outback that we first become acquainted with Colby, the handsome young cowboy with the Texas drawl; Jerri Manthey, the bitch queen from hell; Maralyn “Mad Dog” Hershey, the retired cop who does her own sound FX; Kel, the U.S. Army Captain made famous by a piece of imaginary beef jerky; Elisabeth Filarski, the cutie patootie with the stupid name who cried every day, became BFFS with Kentucky Joe, and landed herself a sweet gig as a talk show host; not to mention Keith, the gourmet chef who “can’t cook rice”, Kimmi, the obnoxious wannabe vegetarian, Nick, the lazy grad student, and Michael “pig killer” Skupin.
This extraordinary cast of characters (there were random others like Jeff Varner and Deb Eaton, but you can’t possibly expect me to drone on about all 16 of them, geez) is the major reason why this season was so great. They played off one another like actors in a sitcom, making one memorable episode after another. The other element that makes this season a particularly memorable one is the outback itself. We’re talking crazy lightening, flash floods sweeping the camp (and food) away, horrible beasties, and withering heat. Australia’s no wuss, people.
The game was still relatively young back in 2000, and either there wasn’t much scheming going on back then or the editors just chose not to show it. As I recall, you don’t see all the scrambling before each tribal council that you see now. People here just seem to go quietly into that dark night, whereas in more current Survivor seasons they fight to the death (unless they’re being royally screwed by a big blindside) to keep their torch lit.
There also seems to be a lot more interaction going on between cute little Jeff Probst and the castaways. He comes down to their beach sometimes, heck, he even shares in their rewards occasionally. If he still does that in season 20 or whatever we’re in, they sure don’t show it much.
And another thing… Ole Jeff’s got a pretty sweet gig. He gets to fly all over the world, visiting beautiful and exotic locales, sampling local cuisine, probably staying in fancy hotels, enjoying the finest hookers that money can buy, and every couple of days he pops out to the wilderness to make snarky remarks and boss around a bunch of dirty, hungry people.
Who among us wouldn’t want that job?
Knoxville mom of two and personal nurse Tina Wesson for the win (and in my book, she deserves it! She was the nicest person there and she single-handedly saved their replacement rice from the dangerous rapids. She is woman, hear her roar).
FINAL GRADE: A
Off in search of a nifty bandana of my own,
M.
Sunday, April 11, 2010
Day Ninety-Eight: Cactus Flower
CACTUS FLOWER
Starring:
-Walter Matthau
-Ingrid Bergman
-Goldie Hawn
Directed by: Gene Saks
Screenplay Credits: I. A. L. Diamond
MPAA Rating: PG (of course, at its release in 1969, it was rated M for mature audiences only- how times have changed!)
Walter Matthau stars as Julian Winston, a dentist who’s found a pretty sweet set up. He’s convinced his girlfriend Toni (Hawn) that he’s a married man with three children (a blatant lie) so he can avoid her nagging him about furthering the relationship. Toni is desperately in love with him, and is troubled by the idea that he spends so much time with his “wife” (other women). When he cancels one of their dates, Toni writes him a letter telling him she’s going to kill herself, goes home, turns on the gas, and lies on the sofa with her arms folded, ready for death.
Lucky for Toni, her neighbor Igor Sullivan (burgeoning playwright) smells the gas, breaks into her apartment and rescues her. Toni decides not to commit suicide after all and asks Igor to phone Julian’s office in the morning and tell him she’s not dead.
He does, but it’s too late. Julian has already discovered Toni’s letter and his on her way to his apartment. Julian’s secretary, Miss Stephanie Dickinson (Ingrid Bergman) receives the call seconds after he leaves.
Toni’s willingness to kill herself over him tells Julian that this is the woman he wants to marry. There’s just one problem: he’s convinced her he’s already married, and she is absolutely phobic about men who lie. Julian has no choice but to tell her that he’s leaving his wife.
He expects this news to put Toni over the moon, but instead she worries about being a “housebreaker.” She insists that she will not marry Julian unless she can meet his wife and see for herself that the woman does indeed want to divorce her husband.
With no other options, Julian turns to the only woman who’ll do anything for him, his longsuffering secretary of ten years who (as is evident to the audience) is madly and secretly in love with him. Stephanie agrees to play the part of “Mrs. Winston” for the man that she loves, which of course gets all of them into a whole heap of trouble as they struggle to keep the wool pulled over Goldie Hawn’s enormous eyes.
This was my first viewing and I really enjoyed it. You can certainly tell that it was originally a play, but to me that is part of the piece’s charm. Bergman was a delight from the first scene to the last, but interestingly it was Hawn who won the Best Supporting Actress Academy Award for her performance.
Matthau is simply precious as grumbly, rumpled, square Dr. Winston, and it’s especially fun to watch him come to the realization that he’s tired of dealing with Toni and wants to “go home to his wife” (meaning Stephanie). I also loved the conversation in which Stephanie and Julian argue about wanting a divorce of their own, meaning a dissolution to their partnership.
In the end of course, things work out just as predictably as you think they will, but it’s still enjoyable watching the actors cross the finish line. However, one of the most interesting things for me was watching all the scenes set in the discotheque (which is a totally awesome word). It’s fascinating to me what passed as dancing in the 1969. To me it just looks like people throwing their bodies around in weird contortions. But the best of the bunch at the spacey dancing is Hawn, without question. She has this dopey little look on her face, not unlike a stoned pixie trying to imitate Ray Charles.
Check it out if you don’t believe me.
FINAL GRADE: A-
Off in search of a(nother) wife,
M.
Starring:
-Walter Matthau
-Ingrid Bergman
-Goldie Hawn
Directed by: Gene Saks
Screenplay Credits: I. A. L. Diamond
MPAA Rating: PG (of course, at its release in 1969, it was rated M for mature audiences only- how times have changed!)
Walter Matthau stars as Julian Winston, a dentist who’s found a pretty sweet set up. He’s convinced his girlfriend Toni (Hawn) that he’s a married man with three children (a blatant lie) so he can avoid her nagging him about furthering the relationship. Toni is desperately in love with him, and is troubled by the idea that he spends so much time with his “wife” (other women). When he cancels one of their dates, Toni writes him a letter telling him she’s going to kill herself, goes home, turns on the gas, and lies on the sofa with her arms folded, ready for death.
Lucky for Toni, her neighbor Igor Sullivan (burgeoning playwright) smells the gas, breaks into her apartment and rescues her. Toni decides not to commit suicide after all and asks Igor to phone Julian’s office in the morning and tell him she’s not dead.
He does, but it’s too late. Julian has already discovered Toni’s letter and his on her way to his apartment. Julian’s secretary, Miss Stephanie Dickinson (Ingrid Bergman) receives the call seconds after he leaves.
Toni’s willingness to kill herself over him tells Julian that this is the woman he wants to marry. There’s just one problem: he’s convinced her he’s already married, and she is absolutely phobic about men who lie. Julian has no choice but to tell her that he’s leaving his wife.
He expects this news to put Toni over the moon, but instead she worries about being a “housebreaker.” She insists that she will not marry Julian unless she can meet his wife and see for herself that the woman does indeed want to divorce her husband.
With no other options, Julian turns to the only woman who’ll do anything for him, his longsuffering secretary of ten years who (as is evident to the audience) is madly and secretly in love with him. Stephanie agrees to play the part of “Mrs. Winston” for the man that she loves, which of course gets all of them into a whole heap of trouble as they struggle to keep the wool pulled over Goldie Hawn’s enormous eyes.
This was my first viewing and I really enjoyed it. You can certainly tell that it was originally a play, but to me that is part of the piece’s charm. Bergman was a delight from the first scene to the last, but interestingly it was Hawn who won the Best Supporting Actress Academy Award for her performance.
Matthau is simply precious as grumbly, rumpled, square Dr. Winston, and it’s especially fun to watch him come to the realization that he’s tired of dealing with Toni and wants to “go home to his wife” (meaning Stephanie). I also loved the conversation in which Stephanie and Julian argue about wanting a divorce of their own, meaning a dissolution to their partnership.
In the end of course, things work out just as predictably as you think they will, but it’s still enjoyable watching the actors cross the finish line. However, one of the most interesting things for me was watching all the scenes set in the discotheque (which is a totally awesome word). It’s fascinating to me what passed as dancing in the 1969. To me it just looks like people throwing their bodies around in weird contortions. But the best of the bunch at the spacey dancing is Hawn, without question. She has this dopey little look on her face, not unlike a stoned pixie trying to imitate Ray Charles.
Check it out if you don’t believe me.
FINAL GRADE: A-
Off in search of a(nother) wife,
M.
Wednesday, April 7, 2010
Day Ninety-Seven: Frost Nixon
FROST NIXON
Starring:
-Frank Langella
-Michael Sheen
-Oliver Platt
-Sam Rockwell
-Kevin Bacon
-Matthew MacFayden
Directed by: Ron Howard
Screenplay Credits: Peter Morgan
MPAA Rating: R - for some language
Originally a play, FROST NIXON is based on a series of interviews conducted by British comedian David Frost shortly after President Richard M. "Tricky Dick" Nixon resigned the presidency. Before signing on for this project, Opie Taylor compared the play script with the actual interviews and was impressed with what he found.
Frank Langella was extraordinary as Nixon. I've always found him a very find actor, and this performance certainly meets his standard of excellence. Michael Sheen, however, failed to impress. I thought he was quite good in the film's climax (when Frost finally works his way to the hard questions and elicits a very emotional response form the former president), but for the rest of the film he seemed smarmy, disingenuous, and most of all twitchy.
Really twitchy.
Like a little rat.
Sheen also portrayed Sir David in the stage play, and one can only hope he delivered a better performance in that medium. At any rate, I would have greatly preferred seeing someone else in the role. His surrounding team, however (including Sam Rockwell and Oliver Platt) were spot on.
The film handles the issue of "sympathy" for Nixon extremely well. There isn't sympathy in the sense that he is absolved from his wrongdoings, but rather a gritty, close-up look at the anger, sadness, and disappointment he felt in himself. When one truly fails himself, it is often rather easy to look on him with pity.
Of course, Ron Howard wanted obvious allusions made to the Bush administration, but with the passing of the recent healthcare bill, I thought only of President Obama during the film. It seems very clear to me that he's taking a few pages from Tricky Dick's book, what with the abuses of power and all. If fact, I would be surprised to find a placard with the following inscribed somewhere in his office: "If the president does it, then it is not illegal."
Keep telling yourself that, Obama. It caught up with Nixon, it will catch up with you.
FINAL GRADE: A
Off in search of people who aren't full of B.S.,
M.
Starring:
-Frank Langella
-Michael Sheen
-Oliver Platt
-Sam Rockwell
-Kevin Bacon
-Matthew MacFayden
Directed by: Ron Howard
Screenplay Credits: Peter Morgan
MPAA Rating: R - for some language
Originally a play, FROST NIXON is based on a series of interviews conducted by British comedian David Frost shortly after President Richard M. "Tricky Dick" Nixon resigned the presidency. Before signing on for this project, Opie Taylor compared the play script with the actual interviews and was impressed with what he found.
Frank Langella was extraordinary as Nixon. I've always found him a very find actor, and this performance certainly meets his standard of excellence. Michael Sheen, however, failed to impress. I thought he was quite good in the film's climax (when Frost finally works his way to the hard questions and elicits a very emotional response form the former president), but for the rest of the film he seemed smarmy, disingenuous, and most of all twitchy.
Really twitchy.
Like a little rat.
Sheen also portrayed Sir David in the stage play, and one can only hope he delivered a better performance in that medium. At any rate, I would have greatly preferred seeing someone else in the role. His surrounding team, however (including Sam Rockwell and Oliver Platt) were spot on.
The film handles the issue of "sympathy" for Nixon extremely well. There isn't sympathy in the sense that he is absolved from his wrongdoings, but rather a gritty, close-up look at the anger, sadness, and disappointment he felt in himself. When one truly fails himself, it is often rather easy to look on him with pity.
Of course, Ron Howard wanted obvious allusions made to the Bush administration, but with the passing of the recent healthcare bill, I thought only of President Obama during the film. It seems very clear to me that he's taking a few pages from Tricky Dick's book, what with the abuses of power and all. If fact, I would be surprised to find a placard with the following inscribed somewhere in his office: "If the president does it, then it is not illegal."
Keep telling yourself that, Obama. It caught up with Nixon, it will catch up with you.
FINAL GRADE: A
Off in search of people who aren't full of B.S.,
M.
Day Ninety-Six: The Indian in the Cupboard
THE INDIAN IN THE CUPBOARD
Starring:
-Richard Jenkins
-David Keith
Directed by: Frank Oz
Screenplay Credits: Melissa Mathison
MPAA Rating: PG
Omri is a horse-faced little boy who receives a magical cupboard for his 9th birthday. Omri soon discovers that if he puts a toy in the cupboard and locks the door, the toy will come to life. Omri creates Little Bear, an Iroquois warrior, and a few other little guys to play with.
For the most part, the dialogue is dry and fairly boring. The most interesting exchanges are between Little Bear and cowboy Boo-Hoo Boone. The funny dialogue comes out when the two are finally allowed to play off each other.
It's an interesting premise for a totally uninteresting movie, which only leaves you with two questions:
1.) Who do these children have such strange names? Omri and Gilley? Seriously?
2.) Why are there so many close-ups of this goofy looking child's head?
FINAL GRADE: C
Off in search of a wife,
M.
Starring:
-Richard Jenkins
-David Keith
Directed by: Frank Oz
Screenplay Credits: Melissa Mathison
MPAA Rating: PG
Omri is a horse-faced little boy who receives a magical cupboard for his 9th birthday. Omri soon discovers that if he puts a toy in the cupboard and locks the door, the toy will come to life. Omri creates Little Bear, an Iroquois warrior, and a few other little guys to play with.
For the most part, the dialogue is dry and fairly boring. The most interesting exchanges are between Little Bear and cowboy Boo-Hoo Boone. The funny dialogue comes out when the two are finally allowed to play off each other.
It's an interesting premise for a totally uninteresting movie, which only leaves you with two questions:
1.) Who do these children have such strange names? Omri and Gilley? Seriously?
2.) Why are there so many close-ups of this goofy looking child's head?
FINAL GRADE: C
Off in search of a wife,
M.
Day Ninety-Five: The Thornbirds
THE THORNBIRDS
Starring:
-Barbara Stanwyck
-Richard Chamberlin
-Rachel Ward
-Jean Simmons
-Bryan Brown
Directed by: Daryl Duke
Teleplay by: Carmen Culver
Barbara Stanwyck plays Mary Carson, the original white-haired horn dog. Mary owns Drogheda, an enormous sheep ranch in Australia. She is disgustingly wealthy, yet morally bankrupt. She's also in love with local priest Father Ralph de Bricassart, played by Richard Chamberlin (who, for whatever reason, has always reminded me of a velociraptor). Richard does not reciprocate these feelings; instead he has an obsession with Mary's young niece, Meggie Cleary. Secrets are revealed and old family struggles continue as the older generations pass away and the youngsters take over Drogheda.
The Thornbirds really is an epic romance that spans the generations. It's more than just Ralph and Meggie, it's the romance of the entire family. It's hard to explain, but it's almost TOO dramatic. One character or another is always waxing poetic (we're looking at you, Father Ralph) about the most random crap. Richard especially has the uncanny ability to launch into a weighty monologue at the drop of a hat, leaving his cast mates frozen beside him, very clearly bored and going over their shopping list in their heads.
And if you stick with the saga to the very end, Richard's endless squawking does become tiring. "I'm a priest! I'm a priest! I love you, but I love God more! BWOCK! I'm a priest!"
Polly want a cracker?
And if you can watch the scenes where Christopher Plummer sits and plays with his cat without thinking about Dr. Evil from Austin Powers, you're a much stronger woman than I.
"Ah, Sheba! Must you be so selfish? You make my legs numb!"
"Ah, Sheba! Must you always dig in your claws when you are happy?"
The scene where the fire breaks out on Drogheda is annoyingly reminiscent of the burning of Atlanta from GONE WITH THE WIND. As everything crackles and burns, one almost expects to see Rhett and Scarlet come flying through on their horse and buggy.
Also, is is just me or is this family constantly marching out to the cemetery to sad music? There's probably ten or twelve funeral sequences in this darn thing, which is bad news for the cast as every single one of them is a terrible cryer. Consider yourself warned, this epic features the most epically horrendous, phony looking crying I've ever seen.
In some scenes you just want to punch Father Ralph in the face. He orbits around Meggie her whole life, spending time with her, making daisy chains, braiding her hair, being her BFF, then he throws all that in her face and starts squawking about the priesthood again.
Meggie, you can never have him because blah, blah, he's a priest, blah.
And even if he wasn't a man of the cloth, you still wouldn't want him. Father Ralph is the kind of man who could never be married to a woman because he's only married to his job. But Meggie never seems to realize that it takes a mighty good man to be better than no man at all.
A few technical notes: the audio doesn't always sync up and diction isn't the actors' main concern. Occasionally, 'Drogheda' comes out more like 'Gordita' or 'Brigitta', bringing to mind either images of the fifth von Trapp child or cheap Mexican food.
For the most part though, I really enjoyed it and will probably watch it again someday.
The original complete saga is presented in two double-sided discs with a decent amount of special features, but the sweeping story of a sexy, forbidden romance is reason enough to give this DVD a whirl.
FINAL GRADE: A-
Off in search of a cracker for Father Ralph,
M.
Starring:
-Barbara Stanwyck
-Richard Chamberlin
-Rachel Ward
-Jean Simmons
-Bryan Brown
Directed by: Daryl Duke
Teleplay by: Carmen Culver
Barbara Stanwyck plays Mary Carson, the original white-haired horn dog. Mary owns Drogheda, an enormous sheep ranch in Australia. She is disgustingly wealthy, yet morally bankrupt. She's also in love with local priest Father Ralph de Bricassart, played by Richard Chamberlin (who, for whatever reason, has always reminded me of a velociraptor). Richard does not reciprocate these feelings; instead he has an obsession with Mary's young niece, Meggie Cleary. Secrets are revealed and old family struggles continue as the older generations pass away and the youngsters take over Drogheda.
The Thornbirds really is an epic romance that spans the generations. It's more than just Ralph and Meggie, it's the romance of the entire family. It's hard to explain, but it's almost TOO dramatic. One character or another is always waxing poetic (we're looking at you, Father Ralph) about the most random crap. Richard especially has the uncanny ability to launch into a weighty monologue at the drop of a hat, leaving his cast mates frozen beside him, very clearly bored and going over their shopping list in their heads.
And if you stick with the saga to the very end, Richard's endless squawking does become tiring. "I'm a priest! I'm a priest! I love you, but I love God more! BWOCK! I'm a priest!"
Polly want a cracker?
And if you can watch the scenes where Christopher Plummer sits and plays with his cat without thinking about Dr. Evil from Austin Powers, you're a much stronger woman than I.
"Ah, Sheba! Must you be so selfish? You make my legs numb!"
"Ah, Sheba! Must you always dig in your claws when you are happy?"
The scene where the fire breaks out on Drogheda is annoyingly reminiscent of the burning of Atlanta from GONE WITH THE WIND. As everything crackles and burns, one almost expects to see Rhett and Scarlet come flying through on their horse and buggy.
Also, is is just me or is this family constantly marching out to the cemetery to sad music? There's probably ten or twelve funeral sequences in this darn thing, which is bad news for the cast as every single one of them is a terrible cryer. Consider yourself warned, this epic features the most epically horrendous, phony looking crying I've ever seen.
In some scenes you just want to punch Father Ralph in the face. He orbits around Meggie her whole life, spending time with her, making daisy chains, braiding her hair, being her BFF, then he throws all that in her face and starts squawking about the priesthood again.
Meggie, you can never have him because blah, blah, he's a priest, blah.
And even if he wasn't a man of the cloth, you still wouldn't want him. Father Ralph is the kind of man who could never be married to a woman because he's only married to his job. But Meggie never seems to realize that it takes a mighty good man to be better than no man at all.
A few technical notes: the audio doesn't always sync up and diction isn't the actors' main concern. Occasionally, 'Drogheda' comes out more like 'Gordita' or 'Brigitta', bringing to mind either images of the fifth von Trapp child or cheap Mexican food.
For the most part though, I really enjoyed it and will probably watch it again someday.
The original complete saga is presented in two double-sided discs with a decent amount of special features, but the sweeping story of a sexy, forbidden romance is reason enough to give this DVD a whirl.
FINAL GRADE: A-
Off in search of a cracker for Father Ralph,
M.
Monday, April 5, 2010
Day Ninety-Four: The Tommyknockers
THE TOMMYKNOCKERS
Starring:
-Jimmy Smits
-Marg Helgenberger
-Traci Lords
Directed by: John Power
Teleplay by: Lawrence D. Cohen
MPAA Rating: unrated
Tommyknockers, Tommyknockers,
knocking at the door;
this freakin' movie is
such a bore!
Sorry Steve King, but for me, TOMMYKNOCKERS went bust.
Writer Marg Helgenberger discovers something sticking out of the ground on her property and convinces her boyfriend Jimmy Smits to help her dig it up. It soon becomes an obsession with Marg, as it emits a weird green glow and makes her feel all happy. Eventually, the town begins to fall under the thing's influence. Soon everyone but Jimmy Smits is subject to its mind control. Jimmy seems immune thanks to the metal plate in his head.
Things get especially weird when everybody starts pulling their teeth out, and my favorite part was when the frumpy housewife electrocuted her philandering husband with the aid of alien intelligence.
I love Jimmy Smits, cause he's all cute and junk, but his perfect mocha skin wasn't enough to redeem him in this case. Normally I can just close my eyes and imagine him as an Indian Chief and I get all happy inside. But not during TOMMYKNOCKERS.
Traci Lords is a decent actress, which might be surprising to some. Porn stars- former or current- aren't usually lauded for their mad dramatic skillz, but she was easily the most entertaining character in the film for me.
At any rate, THE TOMMYKNOCKERS is too long for its own good and completely not worth your time.
FINAL GRADE: D
Off in search of a typewriter that will do my work while I sleep,
M.
Starring:
-Jimmy Smits
-Marg Helgenberger
-Traci Lords
Directed by: John Power
Teleplay by: Lawrence D. Cohen
MPAA Rating: unrated
Tommyknockers, Tommyknockers,
knocking at the door;
this freakin' movie is
such a bore!
Sorry Steve King, but for me, TOMMYKNOCKERS went bust.
Writer Marg Helgenberger discovers something sticking out of the ground on her property and convinces her boyfriend Jimmy Smits to help her dig it up. It soon becomes an obsession with Marg, as it emits a weird green glow and makes her feel all happy. Eventually, the town begins to fall under the thing's influence. Soon everyone but Jimmy Smits is subject to its mind control. Jimmy seems immune thanks to the metal plate in his head.
Things get especially weird when everybody starts pulling their teeth out, and my favorite part was when the frumpy housewife electrocuted her philandering husband with the aid of alien intelligence.
I love Jimmy Smits, cause he's all cute and junk, but his perfect mocha skin wasn't enough to redeem him in this case. Normally I can just close my eyes and imagine him as an Indian Chief and I get all happy inside. But not during TOMMYKNOCKERS.
Traci Lords is a decent actress, which might be surprising to some. Porn stars- former or current- aren't usually lauded for their mad dramatic skillz, but she was easily the most entertaining character in the film for me.
At any rate, THE TOMMYKNOCKERS is too long for its own good and completely not worth your time.
FINAL GRADE: D
Off in search of a typewriter that will do my work while I sleep,
M.
Day Ninety-Three: Stevie Ray Vaughan & Double Trouble Live @ Montreux
SRV & DOUBLE TROUBLE LIVE @ MONTREUX
When SRV and Double Trouble originally appeared at the Montreux Music Festival in Switzerland, they were virtually unknown white guys playing the blues. They were the first unsigned group to appear at Montreux, and they actually got booed. Despite playing a good set, they are visibly shaken by the booers as they exit the stage.
Despite the reactions of a few disgruntled crowd members, the group did well at Montreux by meeting David Bowie, who was so impressed with Stevie Ray he asked him to play on his "Let's Dance" album.
By the time SRV & DT returned to Montreux in '85, they were at the top of their game.
Despite looking woefully stupid in that cowboy hat with the long, shaggy tail, Stevie Ray plays like he's got seconds to live. Fans are used to seeing him pour everything into every performance, but this time he's playing like he's really got something to prove. The energy in the room is electric and, lucky for us, that translates to the screen.
Due to Stevie Ray's tragic demise (which I freely admit to still sobbing about from time to time) future generations will never have the pleasure of shaking Stevie's incredibly talented hand, or experiencing firsthand one of his intense concerts. Thankfully, there are a handful of CDs and DVDs that keep his memory alive and well.
As for me and my house, the first thing I'm going to do when I get to heaven is thank Jesus and give him a big hug. The next thing I'm gonna do is smooch on my grandparents a little, but the third thing I'm gonna do is get tickets to see Stevie Ray.
I know he's up there playing, because for Stevie, it wouldn't be heaven without a guitar.
FINAL GRADE: A+
Off in search of my pride and joy,
M.
When SRV and Double Trouble originally appeared at the Montreux Music Festival in Switzerland, they were virtually unknown white guys playing the blues. They were the first unsigned group to appear at Montreux, and they actually got booed. Despite playing a good set, they are visibly shaken by the booers as they exit the stage.
Despite the reactions of a few disgruntled crowd members, the group did well at Montreux by meeting David Bowie, who was so impressed with Stevie Ray he asked him to play on his "Let's Dance" album.
By the time SRV & DT returned to Montreux in '85, they were at the top of their game.
Despite looking woefully stupid in that cowboy hat with the long, shaggy tail, Stevie Ray plays like he's got seconds to live. Fans are used to seeing him pour everything into every performance, but this time he's playing like he's really got something to prove. The energy in the room is electric and, lucky for us, that translates to the screen.
Due to Stevie Ray's tragic demise (which I freely admit to still sobbing about from time to time) future generations will never have the pleasure of shaking Stevie's incredibly talented hand, or experiencing firsthand one of his intense concerts. Thankfully, there are a handful of CDs and DVDs that keep his memory alive and well.
As for me and my house, the first thing I'm going to do when I get to heaven is thank Jesus and give him a big hug. The next thing I'm gonna do is smooch on my grandparents a little, but the third thing I'm gonna do is get tickets to see Stevie Ray.
I know he's up there playing, because for Stevie, it wouldn't be heaven without a guitar.
FINAL GRADE: A+
Off in search of my pride and joy,
M.
Day Ninety-Two: Where the Wild Things Are
WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE
Starring:
-Max Records
-Catherine Keener
Directed by: Spike Jonze
Screenplay Credits: Spike Jonze & Dave Eggars
MPAA Rating: PG
I wanted so much to like this movie. Sadly, it was not to be. Sometimes trying to turn a 12 page kids book into a feature length film isn't the greatest idea, and in this case Maurice Sendak's classic tale is best left alone.
Young Max is no longer simply a rambunctious, imaginative boy; instead he is moody little beast who seems desperately in need of therapy. After one of his many violent outbursts, Max runs away from home and boards a tiny vessel for a faraway land full of giant, strange-looking monsters. Max befriends Carol, the monster whom we will eventually realize is supposed to parallel the boy.
They run around getting into fights and such before Max realizes he should return home and apologize to his mother.
The monsters each seem to have a different personality and all are obnoxiously whiny. Some sequences are too scary for youngsters, but then I wouldn't want any of my children watching this stupid movie anyway.
FINAL GRADE: D-
Off in search of ANYTHING but this,
M.
Starring:
-Max Records
-Catherine Keener
Directed by: Spike Jonze
Screenplay Credits: Spike Jonze & Dave Eggars
MPAA Rating: PG
I wanted so much to like this movie. Sadly, it was not to be. Sometimes trying to turn a 12 page kids book into a feature length film isn't the greatest idea, and in this case Maurice Sendak's classic tale is best left alone.
Young Max is no longer simply a rambunctious, imaginative boy; instead he is moody little beast who seems desperately in need of therapy. After one of his many violent outbursts, Max runs away from home and boards a tiny vessel for a faraway land full of giant, strange-looking monsters. Max befriends Carol, the monster whom we will eventually realize is supposed to parallel the boy.
They run around getting into fights and such before Max realizes he should return home and apologize to his mother.
The monsters each seem to have a different personality and all are obnoxiously whiny. Some sequences are too scary for youngsters, but then I wouldn't want any of my children watching this stupid movie anyway.
FINAL GRADE: D-
Off in search of ANYTHING but this,
M.
Day Ninety-One: Deliverance
DELIVERANCE
Starring:
-Burt Reynolds
-Jon Voight
-Ned Beatty
-Ronny Cox
Directed by: John Boorman
Screenplay credits: James Dickey
MPAA: R
Well, this was my very first time watching DELIVERANCE, and even though I had no idea what to expect, I certainly was not expecting that. The first thing that needs to be mentioned before we go any further is this: HOLY CRAP, wouldja get a look at Burt Reynolds' arms?!?!
I maintain that he looks strange without his mustache, but this does not make him any less of a manbeast.
The basic plot (for those of you weirdos like me who never sat down with the hillbilly version of BOURNE IDENTITY) is this: four dudes from the city decide to get in touch with their Jeremiah Johnson sides and go canoeing down this river. The whole area (including the local town of inbred citizens) will soon be flooded thanks to the imminent construction of dam.
The fellas roll out to the country and one of them strikes up a rousting performance of "Dueling Banjos" with one of the aforementioned yokels (here it should be mentioned that the "yokel" in question also appeared as a banjo player in Tim Burton's 2003 hit BIG FISH).
The foursome then embarks on their little trip, cruising the rapids and having a grand ole time. That night they stop to make a fire. Ned Beatty is mean to his inflatable mattress and the guys hear "something or someone" in the woods.
The next day is when things start to get serious. Jon Voight & Ned Beatty get separated from Burt and Ronny Cox and wind up held at gunpoint by a couple of toothless mountain men. It soon becomes very clear that these men are, um, interested in some of that hot city of Sodom action. Poor Jon gets tied to a tree with his own belt and it forced to watch Ned squeal like a pig. And it is freaky. Also, does anybody ever confuse Ned Beatty with M. Emmett Walsh, or is that just me?
Anyway, Burt comes up on the bad guys with his bow and arrow and pegs one right through the middle.
Nice shot, Burt. Wanna meet up later?
The men hastily decide to bury the body and get the heck out of dodge. The possible murder charges and other implications of this act have now become the white elephant in the canoe.
The men decide that since one of them has now been anally raped, the fun is now over. They start paddling like crazy and Ronny Cox inexplicably tumbles out of the canoe. All the men freak and crash and poor Burt breaks his femur.
One of their canoes has been destroyed and they're convinced that Ronny was shot from afar by The Man Who Got Away. They've no choice but to stop for the night and Jon makes it his mission to kill the second hillbilly.
The rest of the movie was tense, but it does kind of go down hill after the "you got a purdy mouth" scene. At the end of the day, I would say that i enjoyed it about as much as anybody could. Good performances, nice shots, beautiful scenery, S &M... you know, everything that makes a great film.
I especially liked the use of banjo music. The beginning "duel" between the outsider and the yokel set the tone for the rest of the film, and the subsequent banjo-related scenes are eerie reminders that these guys are way out their element.
This movie also adds to The List of Awesome People (fictitious or non) Who are Skilled with Bows and Arrows (list includes such venerable folk as Luke Duke - seriously, who would name their kid that?- Chuck Norris, and my uncle Paul).
Closing thoughts: Knowing very few mountain men personally, I have to wonder whether or not they are offended by this movie. Either that, or they consider it akin to watching "America's Funniest Home Videos."
FINAL GRADE: A
Off in search of a good banjo.
M.
Starring:
-Burt Reynolds
-Jon Voight
-Ned Beatty
-Ronny Cox
Directed by: John Boorman
Screenplay credits: James Dickey
MPAA: R
Well, this was my very first time watching DELIVERANCE, and even though I had no idea what to expect, I certainly was not expecting that. The first thing that needs to be mentioned before we go any further is this: HOLY CRAP, wouldja get a look at Burt Reynolds' arms?!?!
I maintain that he looks strange without his mustache, but this does not make him any less of a manbeast.
The basic plot (for those of you weirdos like me who never sat down with the hillbilly version of BOURNE IDENTITY) is this: four dudes from the city decide to get in touch with their Jeremiah Johnson sides and go canoeing down this river. The whole area (including the local town of inbred citizens) will soon be flooded thanks to the imminent construction of dam.
The fellas roll out to the country and one of them strikes up a rousting performance of "Dueling Banjos" with one of the aforementioned yokels (here it should be mentioned that the "yokel" in question also appeared as a banjo player in Tim Burton's 2003 hit BIG FISH).
The foursome then embarks on their little trip, cruising the rapids and having a grand ole time. That night they stop to make a fire. Ned Beatty is mean to his inflatable mattress and the guys hear "something or someone" in the woods.
The next day is when things start to get serious. Jon Voight & Ned Beatty get separated from Burt and Ronny Cox and wind up held at gunpoint by a couple of toothless mountain men. It soon becomes very clear that these men are, um, interested in some of that hot city of Sodom action. Poor Jon gets tied to a tree with his own belt and it forced to watch Ned squeal like a pig. And it is freaky. Also, does anybody ever confuse Ned Beatty with M. Emmett Walsh, or is that just me?
Anyway, Burt comes up on the bad guys with his bow and arrow and pegs one right through the middle.
Nice shot, Burt. Wanna meet up later?
The men hastily decide to bury the body and get the heck out of dodge. The possible murder charges and other implications of this act have now become the white elephant in the canoe.
The men decide that since one of them has now been anally raped, the fun is now over. They start paddling like crazy and Ronny Cox inexplicably tumbles out of the canoe. All the men freak and crash and poor Burt breaks his femur.
One of their canoes has been destroyed and they're convinced that Ronny was shot from afar by The Man Who Got Away. They've no choice but to stop for the night and Jon makes it his mission to kill the second hillbilly.
The rest of the movie was tense, but it does kind of go down hill after the "you got a purdy mouth" scene. At the end of the day, I would say that i enjoyed it about as much as anybody could. Good performances, nice shots, beautiful scenery, S &M... you know, everything that makes a great film.
I especially liked the use of banjo music. The beginning "duel" between the outsider and the yokel set the tone for the rest of the film, and the subsequent banjo-related scenes are eerie reminders that these guys are way out their element.
This movie also adds to The List of Awesome People (fictitious or non) Who are Skilled with Bows and Arrows (list includes such venerable folk as Luke Duke - seriously, who would name their kid that?- Chuck Norris, and my uncle Paul).
Closing thoughts: Knowing very few mountain men personally, I have to wonder whether or not they are offended by this movie. Either that, or they consider it akin to watching "America's Funniest Home Videos."
FINAL GRADE: A
Off in search of a good banjo.
M.
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